“As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another.” – Proverbs 27:17
We’ve reached the final principle in staying strong, but in many ways, this is where the real adventure begins. Everything we’ve explored—strengthening ourselves in the Lord, holding onto His promises, taking meaningful action—all of these disciplines find their ultimate expression when we grow together with others.
The writer of Proverbs understood something profound: we become our best selves not in isolation, but in community. When iron strikes iron, sparks fly and both pieces become sharper, more effective, more ready for their intended purpose.
The Aquila and Priscilla Partnership
In my book Stay Strong, I explore the remarkable partnership of Aquila and Priscilla—one of Scripture’s most beautiful examples of growing together. This married couple appears throughout the New Testament as a powerful team that demonstrates how healthy spiritual partnership transforms not just individuals, but entire communities.
When they encountered Apollos—a gifted speaker with incomplete understanding of Jesus—they didn’t publicly correct him. Instead, “they invited him to their home and explained to him the way of God more adequately.” Their friendship created a safe space for growth.
Paul later wrote about them: “They risked their lives for me. Not only I but all the churches of the Gentiles are grateful to them.” Their commitment to growing together benefited not just themselves, but entire communities of believers.
The Anatomy of Spiritual Sharpening
Think about what happens when a blacksmith sharpens a blade. The process involves friction, heat, and intentional contact between two hard surfaces. It’s not always comfortable, but it’s necessary for effectiveness.
Similarly, when we allow others to speak into our lives, to challenge our thinking, and to hold us accountable, we become more effective in our calling.
What does healthy “iron sharpening iron” look like? These are people who:
- Love you enough to tell you the truth, even when it’s difficult
- Celebrate your victories without jealousy and support your failures without judgment
- Challenge you to grow and refuse to let you settle for mediocrity
- Sometimes simply sit with you without trying to fix everything
Finding Your Growth Partners
Not every relationship provides the healthy friction that leads to growth. Some relationships dull our edge rather than sharpen it. The key is identifying and cultivating relationships that truly help us become better.
Look for people who demonstrate these characteristics:
- Integrity: They’re committed to their own spiritual growth
- Courage: They love you enough to speak truth into your life
- Loyalty: They celebrate your victories and support you through struggles
Don’t be afraid to assess your current relationships honestly. As I’ve told my kids: “You become like who you hang out with.” Sometimes you need to quietly and politely shift toward more constructive relationships.
The Multiplication Effect
One of the most exciting aspects of growing together is how it multiplies beyond our immediate relationships. When Aquila and Priscilla invested in Apollos, they weren’t just helping one person—they were investing in everyone Apollos would eventually influence.
Your commitment to growing together isn’t just about personal development—it’s about God’s larger purposes. Every relationship that helps you grow closer to Christ increases your capacity to help others do the same.
As you stay strong in this season, remember: God has incredible things planned for you and the communities you’re part of. Find your people. Be someone’s iron. Create communities where growth is expected and celebrated.
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